Breed People

There is a giant problem with people in my breed. I suppose that there is a giant problem with most people in most breeds. Actually, there are giant problems among most people in general, but all of my anger today is not to be wasted on everyone. There is a giant problem when people have engulfed their lives in a dog, a breed, yet still fail to to appreciate these dogs for the dogs that they are instead of one feature.

Of course, I specifically allude to the Fur Freaks. That's right, all those people are are convinced that the only special thing about a Coton de Tuléar is its hair. "Why do you have this breed if you ruin it by cutting off the hair that makes it amazing?" They demand of me. Why would I get a Coton de Tulear if I did not want to maintain 6 inches of puff? Do I not know anything? Do I not know that the hair on the Coton de Tuléar should never be cut? Or is it that their bodies can be, but never their heads? Something like that. Do you know what I have for that? Who the Hell are you? That's have I've got.

Nothing special my ass. I'm sorry that your dog is nothing but a symbol of hair, and some home ornament for you to shampoo and brush. Dog, brush your own hair all day if you love it that much. Don't waste an awesome dog on your hair fetish. I assure you that there is plenty amazing, and plenty special about my dog. He could be shaved bald, and he'd look like a moron, but he would still be amazing, and still be special, and still be the coolest, most popular dog in the West. So suck it. In addition to being amazing, and special, and awesome, my dogs have their hair cut (one to 1/2 of natural length, and one to 1/4 of natural length or even less... OOOOoooohhhhh TABOO!!!!), and they look great. So Suck. It.

By the way, groomer snobs, the reason that "No groomer knows how to properly groom a Coton" is because there IS no pet clip for your groomer to know. Stop saying that the dog is "groomed like a Bichon" because it isn't. What did they do, crimp it? I doubt it. S/he has to make it up to suit your pet needs, and s/he cannot read your mind. "Puppy cut" and "Summer cut" are universal terms for NOTHING, so stop expecting your groomer to create miracles.

Oh, and by the way, it's Cotons de Tulear, not Coton de Tulears. "Coton" is a noun, and "de Tulear" is the modifier. We don't say that the neighbour has two Germans Shepherd. The Shepherd is the object, so the shepherd gets pluralized. So much for you know everything.